While our personal style icon is Paz de la Huerta in anything ever, we can understand the need to look polished for evening events, and not like we’ve spent the last 72 hours marinating in whiskey and back sweat.
However, we at ShopSquad like minimizing the time we spend transitioning from the office to the bar, so here are three gender-neutral grooming essentials that every working stiff / aspiring debauchee should keep at his or her desk and/or laptop bag:
Deodorant — “Clean” and “smells nice” are pretty much the baseline for pleasing personal impressions, much like “not dead” and “can read” are commonly accepted standards for romantic relationships (then again, we’ve dated Bukowski fans before, so… yeah, not so much on the standards). Swipe on some industrial-strength deodorant in the morning and refresh at 5 p.m.; you’ll avoid the potential awkwardness of coworkers walking in on you giving yourself sponge baths in the company kitchenette.
Face wipes — Half physical, half psychological. Slough off the detritus of modern-day commuting and work-induced agony. Sure, your boss may have humiliated you in front of all of Accounting three hours ago, but that fetching bartender at Trivia Night doesn’t have to know. It’s like a new you!
Lotion – You know that tight feeling you get in your face right after you wash it? It’s a sign that your skin is thirsty and vulnerable, like Keira Knightley in A Dangerous Method. So before you step out the door, rub a drop of unscented lotion on your face to minimize dryness/flakiness. And if you worry about your forehead getting shiny, well, that’s what toilet seat covers are for.
As always, you can get expert advice on purchases, grooming or otherwise, at ShopSquad.